The breath of the spirit. When a Christian community is home for a young transgender person

Reflections by Carl Siciliano* taken from his bookMaking Room: Three Decades of Fighting for Beds, Belonging, and a Safe Place for LGBTQ Youth(Making Space: Three Decades of Fighting for a Bed, Belonging, and a Safe Place for LGBTQ Youth), publisher Convergent, 2024, chapter 2, freely translated by the volunteers of the Gionata Project

Years after the death of Ali, a young transgender man I had met, I was lucky enough to meet Darrell, one of his younger brothers.

Ali had never talked much about his childhood, but I wanted to understand how he came to proclaim his faith in God with such intensity and freedom.

Darrell gave me my first glimpse into the answer. He told me that Ali's family frequented the True Worship Church, right in front of the public housing complex where they lived, in East New York (United States). I found some documents online that refer to this church as a Southern Baptist congregation, while others call it a Pentecostal community.

Ali's family attended religious services every day.

Darrell remembered the music during the services: a choir accompanied by electric guitars, drums and tambourines. But what he remembered most were the people who “were taken by spirits.” During the singing, some worshipers felt overwhelmed by the presence of the Holy Spirit – another name for the presence of God – and began jumping, speaking in unknown tongues and writhing on the floor.

“I was just a kid,” Darrell said. “but it scared me when people were prey to the Spirit. Sometimes they hurt themselves rolling on the floor. It seemed like they weren't themselves anymore, like they were possessed or something."

Darrell had wondered if the churchgoers were faking it, putting on a show to impress others. “But one day it happened to me too. I felt a rush of excitement during a hymn, and before I knew it I was on the floor.”

“What's happening?” Darrell asked Pastor Keaton, who helped him up. “Son, you've been taken by the Spirit!”

According to Darrell, Ali was the one in the family who was most often haunted by the spirit. It happened at almost every cult. Every time Darrell asked him about it, Ali would smile and say, “It was a good celebration today!”

Having known many homeless kids who grew up in churches where they were taught that their queer identity made them detestable to God, I asked Darrell how Ali being transgender was received at his church, True Worship Church.

To my surprise, he told me that the church was the only place where Ali was welcomed.

“Everyone was welcome in the house of God, and was welcomed without judgment,” Darrell said. Ali felt safe there, hugged by dogs.

“It was the people in the public housing projects where we lived, who didn't go to church, who tormented my brother.”

I was pleased to hear Darrell recount such positive memories of Ali's formative religious experiences, although I must admit I wondered whether his memories were idealized.

The last time I heard from Ali's sister, she sent me an aggressive email, claiming that Ali was possessed by the devil. I don't know how to reconcile Darrell's story with his.

However, what is indisputable is that Ali had experienced something profoundly inclusive in that religious community. Her faith had thus become a rock to which she would cling for the rest of her (short) life. (…)

* Carl Siciliano is the founder of the Ali Forney Center (AFC) in New York City, the largest center in the United States dedicated to providing support and housing to homeless LGBTQ+ youth. In his book “Making Room: Three Decades of Fighting for Beds, Belonging, and a Safe Place for LGBTQ Youth(Making Space: Three Decades of Fighting for a Bed, Belonging, and a Safe Place for LGBTQ Youth)”, published on May 21, 2024, Siciliano recounts his thirty-year experience in the fight to guarantee a safe refuge for homeless LGBTQ+ young people. In “Making Room,” Siciliano describes how meeting Ali Forney, a nonbinary African-American teenager, profoundly influenced his commitment. Ali Forney, known for his unwavering faith that “God will love me for who I am,” was murdered in 1997. This tragic event inspired him to create safe spaces for homeless queer youth, leading to the founding of the Ali Forney Center in 2002. The book offers a moving testimony to the challenges faced by homeless LGBTQ+ youth and highlights the importance of community and solidarity in the fight for their rights and dignity.

Original text: Catching the Ghost